Brooklyn Nine-Nine S01E17 Recap: "Full Boyle"

This week on Brooklyn Nine-Nine: racism, gay politics (not the kind you think) and going 'Full Boyle'.

Boyle has been super confident since he swapped umami-flavored spit with that other foodie at Holt's party. Struttin' around in cool blue jeans, makin' ladies swoon, seranadin' dead guys; you know doin' totally un-Boyle like things (except for maybe the last one).

Not only did he swap spit with the older professor but they are gearing up to celebrate their 20 day anniversary. However, Boyle's infatuation is so intense Peralta tells him he's reached Full Boyle: getting too serious and scaring his lady away. For example he might say "I Love You" to quickly, like perhaps on a first date.

Hm sounds very familiar- like the pilot of a very successful sitcom involving a group of friends and one of the lead guys goes on a first date and tells the girl he loves her.... something about it being a long story about how a dad met the mother of his children.... Shoot. It will come to me later. For some reason the phrase "Suit Up!" is floating around my head.

Anyway, back to Boyle- Jake convinces him to make his anniversary a double date so he can run interference but oh no! Jake's date is hot and perfect because she loves Die Hard and the New York Nets.

Look a Jezebel blogger might say that projecting the character traits of a male protagonist onto a female to make her his 'dream girl' is sexist and also really psychologically messed up and narcissistic, but I'm not here to preach. Also, I met a guy who was super into talking about how cool Jennifer Lawrence is so guys your dream action-movie-lovin', sports-fan of a dream girl may be out there too! Probably not enough for all of you but... go ahead an duke it out over the few there are.

Long story short: Boyle makes an excuse to leave, but is on his way back with an engagement ring when Jake intercepts him. Jake drops the ring in hot-dog water and then they pepper spray each other. However, turns out that Jake was wrong about Boyle screwing up his relationship with Vivian; she's as crazy about him as he is. So Boyle proposes and they get engaged.

In the mean time, a young gay black cop wants to unseat Holt as president of the African American Gay police officer advocacy group he started with an impossibly long name and an even worse acronym: AAGLNYCPA. At first Holt is set on destroying him but then Gina (of all people) convinces him that maybe after struggling for 25 years, its time for the next generation of leadership.

Also, Santiago and Diaz are mean to a pyjama wearing vigilante and Terry punishes them after it turns out that the vigilante has valuable intel on a drug case.

Oh and the thing about racism was that an unmarked cab was robbing tourists but because tourists are racist and the cab driver wasn't white, there was no accurate description. So Boyle and Peralta posed as tourists until they got in the right cab.

I was glad to see Jake appear as more of a wing-man this episode, or as much of a wing-man as he can being the main character. I love me some Boyle weirdness, and boy did he deliver with the outlandish and extravagant romantic plans: Gondola ride along the Gowanus Canal, sex in the Statue of Liberty, tickets to Rome via Vietnam, and his weird displays of affection: "draw you a bubble bath and spoon-feed you caviar", doodling his name with her last name like a love-struck middle-school girl, "her eyes, they're like little drops of cilantro reduction on lily-white flan".

Notes & Quotes
-Boyle's giggle when Vivian compliments him is so good. Like the Pillsbury-Dough-Boy.
-Seeing Gina's dance group Floorgasm perform FINALLY! Unfortunately they were pretty good. Other than Gina. Still exciting.
-Only Andre Braugher can make a line like "My stomach is in flux." and this true statement: "You know what the toughest part of being a gay black police officer is? The descrimination." into a laugh line. Brilliant.
-Boyle: "Sexy train is leaving the station. Look at this caboose. Later sluts."
- Police officers laughing at Holt's request for a african american gay alliance. So real. Then his response: "They never actually said no, so I just went ahead and did it." Sweet retribution!

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